Monday, June 7, 2010

hush hush

Have you ever had a good secret that just bubbled up inside of you all day long, dying for you to share it with not just someone, but everyone? The kind of secret that makes it impossible to concentrate on anything else? One that keeps you up at night, yet keeps you going all day long on full speed anyway? A secret that makes it difficult to eat, to work, to concentrate on all of your comparatively unimportant daily tasks? The kind of secret that almost seems to sustain you all on its own?

There is something inherently different about these happy secrets--they seem to have an energy about them that drives you and distracts you and just oozes out of you until you think you're about to go crazy from trying to internalize something so absolutely monumental.

It is like those first-day-of-school jitters, the excitement of an upcoming vacation, the news of a big promotion, and the agony of waiting to be reunited with a lover, all at once.

If you're lucky enough to have one person to share your secret with, you feel like all you can talk about is "the secret." You never tire of discussing your secret ad infinitum, and awaiting the day, together, when your secret is spilled to the rest of the world. You bond over your secret, and talking to anyone else seems unable to satiate your need for human connection anymore, because noone else can give you what your secret-sharer can.

But the question remains to be answered: what is the shelf-life of a secret? When will it start to go stale? Will it cease to be enough and send you looking for something more? If you share your secret, will it be some sort of cathartic release or will the magic of your secret fade away as it is absorbed into the world? Or will a new secret take its place, slipping into your life just as quickly as the first, surprising you with that familiar electrifying energy?

I will be sure to let you know as soon as I find out. ;)


Scaarlet said...

miss annie said...

@ Scaarlet: oh come on, that is half the fun of having a secret, isn't it? ;)